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Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 17, 2015

Remembering To Count The Dogs

 
 
There are many quotes about counting;  counting your blessings, counting sheep to sleep at night, counting days or hours until . . . whatever that is you are waiting for happens, counting money, counting the stars at night, counting the words you are writing for your novel, especially if you are participating in NaNoWriMo this month! There are many more fine examples, but in counting my brain cells this evening, they seem fewer than normal, so I'll stop with this list above.
 
I have a special count I make each time I let my dogs into the yard. I count them as they come back in. Each body that wiggles or races or drags through my kitchen door is numbered. One, two, three, four, five, six! Once I have reached six  I can close the door and go about my business. Sometimes, I forget to count and just assume six dogs have come back in. Especially challenging, when only half the pack goes out, trying to count who is still in and who is reentering.  Sometimes I mess up. A dog gets left outdoors. While most dogs love to be out, my pack loves to be in. When a dog is left unaccounted for, well, there is a price for me to pay. No dog wants to be outside alone. Not in the heat of a summer day, certainly not in a rain storm, but as I found out a few minutes ago, not in the dark of night.
 
Four hours ago I fed the hounds. I opened the back door to my large fenced yard, well lit by lights around the premises, and dogs ran, in many directions. Dogs ran into the yard, dogs ran into the sunroom, and dogs ran into the living room. I assume they had a game afoot, romping and playing with each other. Of course, the purpose of the open door was for the dogs to go out for their last evening run to pee. All the dogs came safely back to the sunroom and settled in, or so I thought. I'd forgotten to count.
 
Pounding away on my keyboard (sounds like I am really knocking out my NaNoWriMo novel, doesn't it?) I heard a howl from my back yard. A high pitched howl that seemed to come from the far side so I had to think, is this my dog or a neighbors? The howl came again and I knew who it was. (don't you know the sound each of your pups makes? an individual sound like no other dog, the dog's voice as I like to call it) and swung around. Five dogs were sound asleep. Rascal was missing.
 
I looked at the clock at the bottom of my monitor screen. Holy cripes, it was almost eleven-thirty. And my dog was outside making a hideous sound, one my closest neighbor on the other side of the stone wall, would most likely hear. We have a truce - I keep the hounds quiet after ten.
 
Barefoot and in my PJs, I dashed to the kitchen and ran out. Loudly, but quietly as I could, I called out into the night, "Rascal".  What a perfect name for a little thirty-five pound butterball of a dog who gets in trouble more often than not! I called again, my voice a little louder, "Rascal!"
 
Across the yard, from the far corner by the right-of-way, my butterball came running. She sprung into the kitchen and came to a sliding halt. Then she looked at me with a bit of disdain. If I could have read her mind, she might have been saying, you left me outside for four hours!
 
I looked at her and wondered what she had been up to for that time. Her howls only surfaced in the last few minutes. There was a smudge of dirt over her brow, or was that one of her markings? She is a colorful gal. All pinky white, one blue-eye and one brown. Her back looks like a brindle sweater, and her tummy is full of polka dots. My little clown dog. I grabbed a few biscuits and fed her. Smiling, happy she was back inside, although honestly, I had no clue she was missing. Safe in the yard, but missing from her usual spot on the couch.
 
Yes, I count my blessings. And among my blessings are six dogs that make me happy to be a member of the pack. Just shame on me! I must remember to count my dogs when I close my doors. One, two, three, four, five, six. Oh good, now I can relax.
 
 
It's exhausting having an adventure!
 

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

"Awkward Family Pet Photos", In Book Stores Today

I received a review copy of this book and it is a must have for pet lovers! Available today in bookstores!

I grew up with many odd animals, not just cats and dogs! "Awkward Family Pet Photos" brought back memories that made me smile!



The website is as wonderful as the book! Check it out  http://awkwardfamilypetphotos.com/

Run, don't walk, to your nearest book store! "Awkward Family Pet Photos", the funniest pet book you'll see this season, is available today. This book will steal the hearts of all animal lovers. “Awkward Family Pet Photos” is a must have book for anyone who loves their pets. It is mostly a book of outrageous photos of pets and their owners, mixed in with text and stories about some of the pet photos.

You know me. I must write one of the only widow blogs that constantly features dogs! My dogs rescued me, I like to say. Pets are a vital part of any family and are with you through the good times and help you through the bad. I sleep with my five. When you find a man who finds that a plus, call me! The photo below gave me hope!


Maybe this is the guy for me?
One of the few black and white photos in book.
Pet Noir.

As a pet owner myself I am as guilty as the next at dressing my dogs up for special occasions. My chihuahua wears a bunny suit at Easter, my female dogs pose in vintage hats, and my late German Shepherd looked fabulous in a fedora. I love taking photos of my dogs.


The late Mr. Jake. He could wear a hat!

We take for granted that our pets love these antics as much as we do. This book proves that most likely they do. Every page is chock full of color photographs of all kinds of pets. We all think of dogs and cats in family photos, this book goes way beyond the normal family pet, to include some extremely unusual critters that just don’t come to mind when you say “pet”. Yet each photo demonstrates the love of the owner for its special animal.

At first glance at this book, my head started to spin. There are so many photos it is overwhelming. This book is a bit kitschy with its brightly dazzling high gloss color images. Each page is chock full of images so that you can’t just flip through the book and toss it aside as a pretty coffee table book. The more you look at the pages and photographs, the more you see and the more you laugh. I love that this book will take time to ingest. I have many animal books that I’ve looked at and put away to browse through later. You can’t do that with “Awkward Family Pet Photos”, because you want to go back again and again to see what you’ve missed!

The chapters cover dogs, cats, birds, exotic pets, farm animals, family portraits, and holidays with pets. I was very captivated with some of the exotic photos, which included a couple who met while walking their sugar gliders (this actually reminded me of my mother, who had two sugar gliders. I never knew about sugar gliders until mom rescued the pair from a young man), the woman with a opossum in her hair (my old high school boyfriend and I shared two pet opossums, he'd bring his when he visited me and my female Opie), and the family portrait with the snake intertwined around everyone’s head (remember that 7 ft indigo snake, mom, that left mites on all the kids?). The book made me smile and brought back memories of my childhood with a mother who loved exotic animals more than cats and dogs. She has two cats now, but that is another story!


Photo from book. Is that a pet Tiger?


My favorite chapter, however, is the last on Awkward Pets, catching some animals in mighty strange positions! The sweetest in that category is the “bum sniffer” where the dog is sniffing a baby’s butt.

The humor in this book is as amazing as the photos. I went online to check the book out further, and found a YouTube video with a young woman reading the book and laughing so hard she kept tripping from room to room as she flipped through the book. You will laugh your bum off too when you start reading this charming, funny look at life with animals.

Kudos to Mike Bender and Doug Chernack for coming up with a winner! The book is available today in bookstores. If you love animals you owe it to yourself to buy several copies of this book. You will want to keep yours and it will make the perfect holiday gift for your favorite pet lovers.



My own awkward pet moment! That's Princess from The Flying Feathers, featured several times at my shop. I used this photo on a dating site with the heading, Dating Is For The Birds. Wonder why no one contacted me?

Do yourself a big favor! Buy a copy of this charming book today. Check your local book store or buy online with the link on the book website!

Now, excuse me, gotta run. I am inspired to go torture the dogs and take some photos of them wearing the new cowboy hats I purchased for my shop!  Yippee-ki-yay!